back again

I'm back, at least for a while. i started a new job overnights at walmart, it's ok but not the best in the world. The more i get into my terrorism class, the more i want to make it my proffesion, and by that i mean becoming an analyst or something. I'm depressed, i'm going in tomorrow to the doctor to find out about my back, and i'm also going to talk about my depression symptoms. I hate feeling this way. i've loved a girl for almost two years now and the more i hang with her, the more i love her. unfortunatly i don't, "make her heart flutter" so she will never even think of dating me. this really doesn't go well with everything. I find myself crying all the time. i don't get enough sleep n the weekends because i work overnights and i just want to escape from this constant feeling of emptyness and pain. i'm hoping this helps ease my pain, but i'm crying as i write this. it's getting to hard to bare anymore.